DR. MARCIA ZIKHALI CHAMPIONS THE LUV APPROACH TO STRENGTHEN FAMILY BONDS

Precious Mupenzi

• The intergenerational dialogues programme, launched by the Gauteng Department of Social Development at the Wanderers Club in Illovo, Johannesburg, aims to strengthen family relationships through sessions for mothers and daughters, as well as fathers and sons, running until September 27.
• Dr. Marcia Zikhali emphasised the importance of the LUV approach—Listen, Understand, and Validate—encouraging parents to communicate thoughtfully with their children to foster trust and emotional well-being.
• The programme highlighted deep emotional issues, particularly among boys, who shared struggles with expressing their feelings and concerns about family dynamics, underscoring the urgent need for open dialogue within families.

“Effective communication is essential for building trust and understanding within families,” emphasised Dr. Marcia Zikhali, a psychologist from the Gauteng Department of Social Development, as the intergenerational dialogues programme commenced today at the Wanderers Club in Illovo, Johannesburg. Running until Friday, September 27, the programme includes sessions tailored for mothers and daughters, as well as fathers and sons. Dr. Zikhali urged parents to adopt the LUV approach—Listen, Understand, and Validate—when engaging with their children, highlighting its crucial role in fostering open and empathetic dialogue.

“Communication is key to building trust and understanding in families,” Dr. Zikhali stated. “We must be mindful of our choice of words, especially when children are struggling academically or facing personal challenges. Blame and criticism can undermine their self-esteem and exacerbate mental health issues,” she added.

The sessions revealed deep-seated emotions, particularly during the fathers and sons segment, where an atmosphere of vulnerability led to unexpected breakthroughs. Many boys found it challenging to express their feelings, but the safe space created by the programme encouraged them to open up.

One boy, tearfully sharing his struggles, said, “When I try to talk to my dad, it always ends with a beating, without him understanding my point of view or giving me time to explain. I feel like I cannot be honest with him, and it hurts.” His words hung heavily in the air, resonating with many attendees who nodded in solidarity. This emotional moment underscored the urgent need for open dialogue within families, revealing the emotional barriers that often prevent genuine connections between fathers and sons.

Issues raised by the boys included witnessing their fathers drinking excessively and encountering inappropriate content on their phones. The session proved to be a therapeutic experience, allowing young boys to voice concerns about mistreatment and abuse that they often felt too afraid to discuss.

The Mother and Daughter and Father and Son programmes, organised by the Department of Social Development, aim to strengthen family ties through these critical conversations. By empowering both parents and children to address their issues, the initiative seeks to improve communication and foster healthier relationships.

Dr. Zikhali’s call to action urges all parents to engage more thoughtfully with their children, ensuring that every voice is heard and validated.